I agree with this piece directionally, but it also seems hyperbolic in its description of the current state of affairs. I was at a wedding over the weekend where people pretty much kept off their phones all evening. When I hang out with friends we generally keep the phones in our pockets. Yes occasionally someone will look something up on them if it’s directly relevant to the conversation, but then they go away again.
I find the problem of phone addiction impacts me far less in social situations, and more when I’m trying to complete focused work when I’m alone, whether it’s my literal job or a hobby like reading or drawing.
I'm really glad this is true for you! I think it is a rare state of affairs in many circles to attend social events without everyone staring at their phones for large parts of the evening. I'm not sure if this is something survey evidence could illuminate but going to ponder if we can poll some version of this...
Screen time/app usage polls might help. Specifically, how long are you spending looking directly at your phone, and during that time, what are you engaging with?
I suspect time spent looking directly at the phone is less bad than time spent glancing out of the corner of your eye at the phone while claiming to be doing something else.
That sounds like a great wedding! I think where I see phones sneak in, socially, is less during moments of joy and celebration per se and more during moments like the one you describe: There's an information question in a conversation, people look up the answer on their phones, and pretty soon everyone is in Phone World.
And I, too, find that phone addiction is harder to ignore when I’m trying to concentrate on something else. This is why I think we specifically have to resist phones becoming the Default Resting Activity — maybe by not bringing phones in the house. Otherwise it’s just too easy to reach for the phone by habit once you hit a mental roadblock or even become briefly bored.
I concur on all fronts. The piece was a great read (I won the challenge, but there's no way I would've in absence of, well, the explicit challenge), and I have noticed a recent uptick of people in my personal life who seem to have internalized the burgeoning discourse on smartphones and are at least trying to make some adjustments accordingly.
The Sirens' Call of the phone/screen is *much* harder for me to resist when I'm alone.
Good points. I find there are nights where I forget to use my phone (although I'm older than the author and remember social events in the before times pre-phones) and have a great time.
My weakness is the moments of boredom that he mentions. And its not like waiting at the DMV, I mean like the 60 seconds while I'm waiting for my son to get ready for school. For some reason I have to fill that time with information. We need to wean ourselves off that.
I cannot believe I started getting leaky eyed on this, starting right around here:
"What I mean is that we need to stop performing — a little bit, all the time, for the internet — while at the same time begin performing for our family and friends who love us, and even for strangers on the street, whose days are brightened by our presence."
What a beautiful, human piece of writing. I have felt the same things and it's like you've manifested my feelings in writing.
I did get momentarily confused by the “theater kid” metaphor - I was thinking the “theater kid” is the one who engages in some weird and social activity in a place with real humans, rather than the one performing on social media.
"Oh, I'm going to finish this post without distraction. I can do *one* post. Surely."
I did not.
I got a notification that my dog was outside the fence. Find the phone (I was reading on a computer). Get fully dressed.Track the dog with her GPS collar. Let her in.
So I failed. But. I really value that distraction. I like my dog, even if she has a bit of wanderlust and my fence is... imperfect.
The idyllic 1990's world seems to have its own imperfections.
To your point about being able to delete the browser: I wonder how much of this is an effect of the amount of control we give producers (eg, Apple) over their product (eg, iPhone & iOS). If apple was not allowed to stop third parties from developing apps that access deep systems-level functionality (as they can now, under my limited understanding), would this issue already be solved?
I had too much fun with the people on the internet & realized it. I dumped them all & chose my much-more-boring, much-much-smaller, but much-more-tangible circle of real life friends/acquaintances. Greatest choice I've ever made. Shockingly, people in real life get more interesting as you get closer to them, while the people on the internet tend to play all their cards in their hand at once.
Boredom is an astonishingly powerful force, & it's been as delightful as it is agonizing to remember what it's like to be genuinely BORED out of my mind. How sternly it drives me towards other, actual, people. Towards books I should have read years ago. Towards love, towards strangers, towards finishing those projects.
I'm opting out of the attention economy & I strongly recommend you do the same.
I can't wait to find a fully social media free circle. I long to be chatting into the night on a patio with them.
If you ever want to see a window into the past, watch The Masters golf tournaments. Phones are not allowed during the playing of the tournament, and people are given prompt exits if they try to circumvent the rule. They keep landlines on the premises in case of emergency. The difference? You see thousands of people engaged with what they're watching & doing, and not just viewing it through the phone lenses as they make little TikTok stories or taking pics to post on their Facebook or Instagram accounts or whatever.
Also I made it through the article without going anywhere! It helps I read on my actual desktop computer where I'm not bombarded with constant distractions popping up
I’ve noticed that about The Masters too. (Well, really, I read someone on social media making the same point you just made.) It gives the whole tournament a different feel, I think. I’d love to see other sports events adopt the same rules.
I suspect golf is one of those sports that requires significant discipline to pay attention to, so they probably needed to institute the no-phone rule early!
I'm not feeling any of this. It's easy to forget how things used to be before cellphones. It was so easy to disconnect and lose touch with people.
Endless boredom in practice meant sitting around watching hours of TV every day. 20 minutes of commercials for each hour of programming. Hope you enjoy re-runs.
The challenge to read the whole article feels a little weird. Probably a large majority of articles on here are read on phones.
If I'm at a party and someone checks their phone, I try to remember that I don't need to be the center of attention at every moment.
Unbelievable. I only subscribed a couple of days ago and I’m already regretting it. I thought I was signing up for cool policy discussion, not dime-a-dozen blanket social policing of and assumption-making about people you’ve never met. Ugh.
This is a beautiful piece of writing and a really great idea of a platonic local community; however, I might be a horrible person for saying this, but I really don't think this vision of the future is really ever going to happen again.
It's a wonderful goal and picture of an ideal society, but going back to a "dumb-phone" era isnt going to happen. Smartphones are too integral to our lives now; we don't just use them to surf social media or doom scroll through horrible news.
Once again, I think it's a really healthy goal to try and participate in local events, spend time with friends and loved ones, and be attentive and engaged with our family, but it's not possible with how interconnected our lives are to our phones to completely switch them off.
Me, geothermal policy nerd and Shift Key listener: How cool that Robinson Meyer is writing for The Argument, looking forward to hearing more of his thoughts on climate policy!
Robinson Meyer: *comes right out the gate with the most intense, accurate polemic on a totally unrelated topic*
Thank you for saying the quiet part out loud: these devices are not just bad/have tradeoffs/etc., they are actively destroying many people's brains and key pillars of our society.
I got a Sunbeam Bluebird dumbphone a few months ago and it's been amazing.
Ironically, I clicked to make a comment and then Substack prompted me to check my email to type in a code to verify I am subscribed, so I checked my phone for that code. I successfully did not open Instagram, though!
I feel this post every day. Especially the constant gnawing sense of missing out on something happening on the phone. I have been trying (and failing) to start a "computer room" in my house like we had when I was a kid where I place my phone in its designated spot when I get home and force myself to only use it in that spot. People my age remember having to share a desktop computer with their whole family like this even after 2008, before our parents let us get smartphones.
I have also been going over to visit with two of my neighbors who are older and do not use smartphones. I always leave feeling like there is a magical innocence to their space. They always have some home-baked southern dessert for us and never have a phone out. Thanks for this piece.
The PSA thing is kinda interesting. I could be wrong, but weren't there a lot of PSAs in the mid-20th century about social etiquette? This has a legit public health reason too, so I think it makes all the sense in the world to start suggesting some social etiquette and boundaries when it comes to phone usage.
Let’s see what affluent school districts do with the no phones in schools movement. Count me skeptical that Boards will stand up for education . How did we ever get through te 1960s safely?
I agree with this piece directionally, but it also seems hyperbolic in its description of the current state of affairs. I was at a wedding over the weekend where people pretty much kept off their phones all evening. When I hang out with friends we generally keep the phones in our pockets. Yes occasionally someone will look something up on them if it’s directly relevant to the conversation, but then they go away again.
I find the problem of phone addiction impacts me far less in social situations, and more when I’m trying to complete focused work when I’m alone, whether it’s my literal job or a hobby like reading or drawing.
I'm really glad this is true for you! I think it is a rare state of affairs in many circles to attend social events without everyone staring at their phones for large parts of the evening. I'm not sure if this is something survey evidence could illuminate but going to ponder if we can poll some version of this...
Screen time/app usage polls might help. Specifically, how long are you spending looking directly at your phone, and during that time, what are you engaging with?
I suspect time spent looking directly at the phone is less bad than time spent glancing out of the corner of your eye at the phone while claiming to be doing something else.
That sounds like a great wedding! I think where I see phones sneak in, socially, is less during moments of joy and celebration per se and more during moments like the one you describe: There's an information question in a conversation, people look up the answer on their phones, and pretty soon everyone is in Phone World.
And I, too, find that phone addiction is harder to ignore when I’m trying to concentrate on something else. This is why I think we specifically have to resist phones becoming the Default Resting Activity — maybe by not bringing phones in the house. Otherwise it’s just too easy to reach for the phone by habit once you hit a mental roadblock or even become briefly bored.
I concur on all fronts. The piece was a great read (I won the challenge, but there's no way I would've in absence of, well, the explicit challenge), and I have noticed a recent uptick of people in my personal life who seem to have internalized the burgeoning discourse on smartphones and are at least trying to make some adjustments accordingly.
The Sirens' Call of the phone/screen is *much* harder for me to resist when I'm alone.
Good points. I find there are nights where I forget to use my phone (although I'm older than the author and remember social events in the before times pre-phones) and have a great time.
My weakness is the moments of boredom that he mentions. And its not like waiting at the DMV, I mean like the 60 seconds while I'm waiting for my son to get ready for school. For some reason I have to fill that time with information. We need to wean ourselves off that.
I won the challenge! (Although I was reading this on my phone when I should be making breakfast.)
Without our phones, how are we going to read The Argument?
Wait, are other people not printing out every article to enjoy in their wing back chair and smoking jacket?
I cannot believe I started getting leaky eyed on this, starting right around here:
"What I mean is that we need to stop performing — a little bit, all the time, for the internet — while at the same time begin performing for our family and friends who love us, and even for strangers on the street, whose days are brightened by our presence."
What a beautiful, human piece of writing. I have felt the same things and it's like you've manifested my feelings in writing.
Also I won the challenge so there
Congrats on winning the challenge! And this is so kind — thank you. It’s reassuring to hear you've felt the same way too.
I did get momentarily confused by the “theater kid” metaphor - I was thinking the “theater kid” is the one who engages in some weird and social activity in a place with real humans, rather than the one performing on social media.
"Oh, I'm going to finish this post without distraction. I can do *one* post. Surely."
I did not.
I got a notification that my dog was outside the fence. Find the phone (I was reading on a computer). Get fully dressed.Track the dog with her GPS collar. Let her in.
So I failed. But. I really value that distraction. I like my dog, even if she has a bit of wanderlust and my fence is... imperfect.
The idyllic 1990's world seems to have its own imperfections.
To your point about being able to delete the browser: I wonder how much of this is an effect of the amount of control we give producers (eg, Apple) over their product (eg, iPhone & iOS). If apple was not allowed to stop third parties from developing apps that access deep systems-level functionality (as they can now, under my limited understanding), would this issue already be solved?
I had too much fun with the people on the internet & realized it. I dumped them all & chose my much-more-boring, much-much-smaller, but much-more-tangible circle of real life friends/acquaintances. Greatest choice I've ever made. Shockingly, people in real life get more interesting as you get closer to them, while the people on the internet tend to play all their cards in their hand at once.
Boredom is an astonishingly powerful force, & it's been as delightful as it is agonizing to remember what it's like to be genuinely BORED out of my mind. How sternly it drives me towards other, actual, people. Towards books I should have read years ago. Towards love, towards strangers, towards finishing those projects.
I'm opting out of the attention economy & I strongly recommend you do the same.
I can't wait to find a fully social media free circle. I long to be chatting into the night on a patio with them.
If you ever want to see a window into the past, watch The Masters golf tournaments. Phones are not allowed during the playing of the tournament, and people are given prompt exits if they try to circumvent the rule. They keep landlines on the premises in case of emergency. The difference? You see thousands of people engaged with what they're watching & doing, and not just viewing it through the phone lenses as they make little TikTok stories or taking pics to post on their Facebook or Instagram accounts or whatever.
Also I made it through the article without going anywhere! It helps I read on my actual desktop computer where I'm not bombarded with constant distractions popping up
I’ve noticed that about The Masters too. (Well, really, I read someone on social media making the same point you just made.) It gives the whole tournament a different feel, I think. I’d love to see other sports events adopt the same rules.
I suspect golf is one of those sports that requires significant discipline to pay attention to, so they probably needed to institute the no-phone rule early!
I'm not feeling any of this. It's easy to forget how things used to be before cellphones. It was so easy to disconnect and lose touch with people.
Endless boredom in practice meant sitting around watching hours of TV every day. 20 minutes of commercials for each hour of programming. Hope you enjoy re-runs.
The challenge to read the whole article feels a little weird. Probably a large majority of articles on here are read on phones.
If I'm at a party and someone checks their phone, I try to remember that I don't need to be the center of attention at every moment.
Unbelievable. I only subscribed a couple of days ago and I’m already regretting it. I thought I was signing up for cool policy discussion, not dime-a-dozen blanket social policing of and assumption-making about people you’ve never met. Ugh.
Fwiw, this is the only article I haven't given a like to so far.
So what you’re telling me is: My smoking cigarettes is a potential net good for society and my fellow man? Copy that 🚬
This is a beautiful piece of writing and a really great idea of a platonic local community; however, I might be a horrible person for saying this, but I really don't think this vision of the future is really ever going to happen again.
It's a wonderful goal and picture of an ideal society, but going back to a "dumb-phone" era isnt going to happen. Smartphones are too integral to our lives now; we don't just use them to surf social media or doom scroll through horrible news.
Once again, I think it's a really healthy goal to try and participate in local events, spend time with friends and loved ones, and be attentive and engaged with our family, but it's not possible with how interconnected our lives are to our phones to completely switch them off.
Me, geothermal policy nerd and Shift Key listener: How cool that Robinson Meyer is writing for The Argument, looking forward to hearing more of his thoughts on climate policy!
Robinson Meyer: *comes right out the gate with the most intense, accurate polemic on a totally unrelated topic*
Thank you for saying the quiet part out loud: these devices are not just bad/have tradeoffs/etc., they are actively destroying many people's brains and key pillars of our society.
I got a Sunbeam Bluebird dumbphone a few months ago and it's been amazing.
Ironically, I clicked to make a comment and then Substack prompted me to check my email to type in a code to verify I am subscribed, so I checked my phone for that code. I successfully did not open Instagram, though!
I feel this post every day. Especially the constant gnawing sense of missing out on something happening on the phone. I have been trying (and failing) to start a "computer room" in my house like we had when I was a kid where I place my phone in its designated spot when I get home and force myself to only use it in that spot. People my age remember having to share a desktop computer with their whole family like this even after 2008, before our parents let us get smartphones.
I have also been going over to visit with two of my neighbors who are older and do not use smartphones. I always leave feeling like there is a magical innocence to their space. They always have some home-baked southern dessert for us and never have a phone out. Thanks for this piece.
Here, here!
The PSA thing is kinda interesting. I could be wrong, but weren't there a lot of PSAs in the mid-20th century about social etiquette? This has a legit public health reason too, so I think it makes all the sense in the world to start suggesting some social etiquette and boundaries when it comes to phone usage.
Let’s see what affluent school districts do with the no phones in schools movement. Count me skeptical that Boards will stand up for education . How did we ever get through te 1960s safely?
That was a really long way to say "I am a Luddite".